I finished yesterday speaking of God’s perfect guidance within. Likewise His perfect comfort is available, as well. Filling the hole is about growing into who we are as new creatures, and as such, learning an identity that is holy and not of this world. Being healed of the wound is about the new creature experience bringing to the soul the comfort of the Holy Spirit, thus one may be released from all identity with and carrying the burden of all deep hurts that occur in this life.
Sometimes, the pain or even horror of a given experience, be it one staggering moment or a series of events building a deep abuse over time, becomes something by which we find our individual definition. No experience thereafter can occur without remembrance of that pain. We become defined by the hurt, either because we refuse to forget as way of revenge, or often because we work hard to function apart from that pain through some coping mechanism.
This is a huge psychological topic, and I hesitate to suggest healing is easy. Yet, I believe comforting us through and to healing is easy for God. We must be willing to do something which is holy and responsible ourselves.
A few suggestions:
Forgive others and receive forgiveness. If the Cross and the pain of the Atonement mean anything, it is that the power of the Holy Blood of Christ cleanses away anyone’s sin, including one’s own.
Forbear. All those you want to be perfect, or at least just a model of goodness, will fail you at some point. In fact, you’re wanting them to be perfect is an idol in the making. Let them go to be whoever their imperfect self is. Likewise, many in their immaturity cannot bring forth good fruits…yet. Forbearance is at the heart of the golden rule.
Cease being a pleaser, as it opens you to wounding. Recognize this is part of your attempt to fill your own hole.
Understand the short time span in which you live; cry honestly and reveal it to someone you trust, but recognize grief is for a limited period. It is not a way of being emotionally that can support you.
Always return (an act of your will) to accepting God’s comfort when your soul wants the wound to hurt again. Our hearts can be so full of vagary. God is ever faithful. When the pain comes upon you, you are facing a temptation to carry the grief and anger of your hurt again. I Cor. 10:13, (paraphrased) God is faithful in the face of all temptations to hold back from you that which you cannot bear. The size of the temptation is the measure of your maturity in Christ. What determines whether you fall to the pain again or receive the comfort of the Lord is your will to choose.
The real spiritual work is in recognizing how Jesus within you, makes you whole. This wholeness is not because of who you are and not in spite of how you have been hurt. It is the abundant life He came to give. Healing the wound is similar to filling the hole. It is all about faith. Your faith becomes the rope between your heart and the supernatural place where God is the Great I Am.
Trust in the goodness of God.